My White Person Life of Crime

So I broke the law one day in Boulder Colorado. It is a fine line between what we teeter.

We were traveling and dropped off our rental car at a relatively obscure location. As we were walking to our friend’s car, we noticed I no longer had my cell phone, I knew it was nearby because I just checked the Timbers score.

My wife walked over to the car and saw the forlorn phone in the rental car. Only problem was that the key to Rental Car was already in the lock box.

Enter Mcgyver. We got back home, we hatched a plan much to the chagrin on the ladies in our lives. We decided to go back to the Rental Car place and recover the keys. My accomplice (keeping him nameless) brought out a long magnet, some claw tool and a common coat hanger. We walked into the car rental place wearing sunglasses because that is the cool thing to do. They were useless.

We slinked behind the counter and used a camera cell phone to see the keys and narrow down our search. All the while people were mindlessly walking by and they did not seem to care all that much. The gripper tool did not work and finally we used a twisted bent coat hanger to miraculously lift out the keys. Only thing it was to the wrong car. We did eventually retrieve the correct set of keys from the lock box.

In retrospect, oh to be white. Could you imagine if we were two black men, in sunglasses, behind an unmanned counter brandishing MacGyver claws.

No harm no foul. The Timbers neither won nor lost.